DontAmend.com Update: Freedom to Marry Week 2004!
 
From Robin Tyler, National co-chair, DontAmend.com
RTDontAmend@aol.com
818-893-4075
 
Hello from DontAmend.com!
 
For those of you who have been keeping up with the unbelievable stories about the threatened anti-gay Constitutional amendment, you know we at DontAmend.com have had a very busy few months.
 
Before we go into what has been happening, let us tell you the good news.
 
l.  WE ARE ORGANIZED FOR ACTIONS!     Valentine's Day, Feb. 14, is now about chocolates, roses and resistance!  DontAmend.com has been helping activists in dozens of cities all over the country to organize rallies and other activities on or about Feb. 14th against a Constitutional amendment and FOR equal marriage rights.  If you want to join in a rally, go to www.dontamend.com and click the button "Equality Week, Freedom to Marry Week Activities."  If you don't see your city up there, and want to organize an event, it's not too late!  We will help with posters, flyers, leaflets, press.  Andy Thayer is our National Rally Co-ordinator.  Just write to ATdontAmend@aol.com or call Andy at 773/209-1187.
 
Why are we helping organize the rallies and other Freedom to Marry Week activities?  Put simply, if we are going to win full, equal legal rights, our community must be mobilized.  When LGBT people and our allies came out into the streets following Matthew Shepard's murder just over five years ago, we initiated a national dialog about the problem of anti-LGBT violence.  Shepard was far from the first person in our community who had been a victim of anti-LGBT hate, but it was the people coming out into the streets of the nation which finally started the dialog.
 
2.  Don't Panic, who generously provided the fundraising T-shirts for stopdrlaura.com (the campaign against hate-radio hostess Dr. Laura Schlessinger), is once again generously providing dontamend.com T-shirts as a fundraiser.  They say "Marriage is a Human Right, not a Heterosexual Privilege."  This T-shirt would make a great Valentine's gift, to your loved one - or yourself.  We are all volunteers, so the money we raise goes solely toward expenses, NOT salaries.  To order T-shirts, click the button on the DontAmend.com website, or go directly to http://www.dontpanic.com/cgi-local/SoftCart.exe/cgi-local/dont-panic/panicdisplay.pl?U+dont-panic+xqvv6218ff7d707d+ts1870&&SKU
 
3.  We have formed a 503c4, non-profit called The Equality Campaign, and can now take donations through the PayPal button on our website.  (no donation is too small!)
 
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Here's the Good, the Bad and the Ugly of what's been going on regarding equal marriage rights:
 
l.  The Good--The Supreme Court of Massachusetts ordered the State to issue marriage licenses as early as May, 2004.  (The marriage issue is currently back before the state's highest court, which has been asked by legislators to clarify whether its landmark ruling last November mandated marriage licenses for gay couples, or left room for Vermont style "civil unions.")
 
2.  The Bad--States are RUSHING to pass "DOMA" bills.  What is DOMA?  It's NOT "Defense of Marriage Act".  In fact, it does nothing to DEFEND marriage.  What the "D" stands for is the DENIAL of Marriage Act.  Ohio's Senate and House passed a House Bill 272, which not only prohibits marriage between same sex-couples, but also precludes the "recognition or extension of the specific statutory benefits of a legal marriage to non-marital relationships between persons of the same sex or different sexes."  The measure prevents state employees from EVER receiving health benefits for their unmarried partners.  Additionally, out of state same-sex couples who are both legal parents of their children may see these adoptions invalidated or not honored when they visit or move to Ohio.  Is this EVIL or WHAT?
 
3.  The Ugly--Well, for those of you who managed to sit through the President's State of the Union Speech, the President attacked the justices of the Supreme Judicial Court of Massachusetts for being "activist judges."  EXCUSE ME?  So when a Supreme Court selects a President, they are OK, but when they issue a landmark ruling saying our community must be treated equally under the law, then they are "activist" judges.  Although he stopped short of an outright endorsement of the anti-gay amendment, he did say "If judges insist on forcing their arbitrary will upon the people, the only alternative left to the people, would be the constitutional process."  So there you have it.  It's not just about same-sex marriage.  It's about destroying the checks and balance system (what's left of it) between different branches of government in this country.  If successful, the proposed anti-gay amendment would be the first time, with the temporary exception of Prohibition, that the Constitution was amended to TAKE AWAY rights.
 
And, as we held our breath for the Democratic Response, neither Senate Minority Leader, Tom Daschle (D-S.D.) nor  House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-California) addressed this attack on the Constitution, let alone marriage.
 
So let's talk about the "Elephant in the Living Room."  Should we continue to applaud those Democrats who say they are "uncomfortable" with, or non-supportive of equal marriage rights for our community?  Is their support of civil unions or domestic partnership good enough?  The problem is that by allowing politicians to oppose equal marriage rights while promoting alleged copies of marriage, we are acquiescing to "separate but equal" measures, in other words, segregation.
 
If you just "trust us," these politicians whisper, we will push for your rights.  Unfortunately it's just such misplaced trust in Bill Clinton that gave us the first DOMA bill, and before that, his "Don't Ask Don't Tell" policy which led to many more purges of LGBT people from the military.  It's time we held politicians of all parties to a higher standard.  We should demand nothing less than full, legal equality - including the equal right to marry.
 
We can learn a great deal from how the laws against interracial marriage were struck down.  In some states, interracial marriage was a felony punishable by five years in the state penitentiary.  Interracial couples were vilified and persecuted, and public opinion, as measured in the polls, backed this racism. 
 
Today, opponents of same-sex marriage point to polls against "gay marriage" to support their side.  But in 1948, when California become the first state to strike down a ban on interracial marriage, 9 out of 10 Americans opposed such unions!  In a USA Today poll last month, 65% of Americans said they opposed same-sex marriage.  Fortunately in 1969, under the influence of the Civil Rights movement, nine "activist" judges led by Chief Justice Earl Warren delivered the US Supreme Court's landmark Loving decision ending all bans on interracial marriage. 
 
Today we need to organize an equal rights movement for LGBT people which aims to remove the ban on same-sex marriage.  If we organize a movement in the streets of the nation of strong, proud LGBT people and our allies, as with the Loving decision, we can help pave the way for equal legal rights for our community.
 
Whether we are Democrats, Republicans, Greens, to the left, to the right or to the center, "pride" means self-esteem.  We need to respect ourselves enough to demand more from those who "represent us."  We have been the victims for decades.  In order to become survivors, and to in the end, to win, we must stop be guilted into silence when politicians refuse to support anything less full equal rights.
 
So during Freedom to Marry week, you can:
 
1)  Register to marry
 
2)  Attend or organize a rally
 
and/or
 
3)  Let the political person you are supporting know that his or her election is not dependent on your being silenced about this issue.  It is just another closet, and we are out of the closet permanently.
 
4) And right now, you can email this article to everyone you know, including but
   not limited to non-gay relatives and friends, and ask them to sign the pledge
   that they will not support in any way, any politician who supports a
   constitutional amendment, on www.dontamend.com
 
 
Remember, we are a movement, fighting for the noblest of causes--the right to love. And with that right, we want, we deserve, we insist, on all of our rights.
 
Robin Tyler
National Co-Chair
DontAmend.com, The Equality Campaign
RTdontamend@aol.com
 

* For more on how the battle for the right to interracial marriage was won, check out an article by Gail Mathabane the January 26th issue of USA Today (http://www.usatoday.com/news/opinion/editorials/2004-01-25-couples_x.htm). Mathabane is co-author "Of Love in Black and White: The Triumph of Love Over Prejudice and Taboo."
 
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