(Washington, D.C.)  US President George W. Bush Monday night gave Saddam Hussein a 48-hour deadline to flee Iraq or face a U.S.-led invasion.

250,000 American troops are poised at the borders of Iraq and war seems inevitable.

It is impossible to know how many gay soldiers currently serve in the U.S. military. Aaron Belkin, director of Center for the Study of Sexual Minorities in the Military, says a conservative estimate is 60,000, but the number could be much higher. According to Steve Ralls, director of communications at the Servicemembers Legal Defense Network the SLDN has received an increase in calls from concerned service members since mobilization began. 

SLDN now receives up to 25 calls each week from soldiers concerned about how to stay in touch with their partners, how to select same-gender individuals for benefits and emergency notification, how to report harassment and how to respond to investigations of their sexuality.

For any servicemember saying goodbye to loved ones as he or she heads off to war is emotional.  The long embraces, the tears, are all recorded for the television cameras at bases across the country. It is hard to imagine what a 20-year-old soldier feels when facing deployment for war. Besides contemplating the unimaginable loss of life or limb, he must confront the possibility of killing another human being, the prospect of profound physical discomfort from harsh weather and hostile terrain, and the loss of leaving loved ones behind.

For gays leaving partners behind it is a farewell said only in private.  

The CSSMM shared the stories of two gay military families.

When the love of his life prepared to leave Fort Bragg for deployment to the Middle East, J.R. packed a bible, a rosary and the St. Michaels medal, symbol of the patron saint of the warrior. "We talked for over an hour that night," J.R. recalled. "I said, if you ever get scared, you talk to the big man upstairs. He'll listen and He'll take care of you."

As families from across the nation traveled to Fort Bragg, North Carolina to hug and pray for their personal heroes from the 82nd Airborne, J.R., who insisted his full name not be used to protect his partner's identity, sat at home alone. 

Another military spouse, W.F., whose partner was deployed to Kuwait in January from Good Fellow Air Force Base in San Angelo, Texas, was also relegated to the shadows as partner left for war.

For their soldier partners elaborate charades must often be carried out just to ensure that suspicions do not arise. "If a straight soldier gets a letter from his girlfriend," says J.R., "he can tell his buddies, pass the letter around, show them pictures. If you're gay or bi, you can't. If you get a letter or photo, you rip it up or burn it; you can't keep it." 

Before W.F. saw his partner off, he was told to strip his letters of any hints that the two were involved. "Writing him letters, I have to be sort of careful what I say," he explained. "I have to be reserved and act like we're just good friends." Though W.F.'s partner is out to nearly his entire platoon, letters to and from deployed soldiers are often screened, so gay soldiers face discharge if they are honest in even their most intimate correspondences.

But it is not only discharge that J.R.'s partner faces if the truth is revealed. He also faces violence. "In the 82nd," J.R. explains, "if it gets out, you're going to get beat up. That threat is always there because of the amount of homophobic remarks made in the barracks." 

Last year, the Servicemembers Legal Defense Network reported that both gay discharges and reports of anti-gay harassment reached record levels. In 2001, the latest year for which figures are available, 1250 troops were fired for being gay, lesbian or bisexual and 1075 complaints of anti-gay harassment were reported.

Earlier this month Secretary of State and State Department, the former head of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, Colin Powell defended the discharging of gay soldiers.  

Gays and lesbians have also been active in the peace movement.  British activist Peter Tatchell was briefly arrested last week for jumping in front of Prime Minister Tony Blair's car.  Tatchell was carrying an anti-war placard and made sure Blair saw it.

Among the American GLBT organizations opposed to the war are the NGLTF, HRC, National Youth Advocacy and others.  

As reported by 365Gay.com last week, a new Harris Poll shows that gays and lesbians are far more skeptical of the Bush administration than the rest of US society. 

Regardless of how gays and lesbians feel about the war there is agreement on one thing: Don't Ask Don't Tell must be stopped. Apart from the US only Russia has a ban on gays in the military.

©365Gay.com Ltd® 2003